Suggested prenup for Prince William & Kate Middleton

With rumours swirling around media corridors that the Royal Couple may have entered into a prenuptial agreement prior to their wedding on 29th April, divorce lawyers, Lloyd Platt & Co have had an amusing look at what the Couple may have put in their prenuptial agreement in their own words.? For those cynical, critical and humourless lawyers reading this document, it does not of course follow the normal format.

From William

The Engagement Ring

I jolly well want this back and will promise to keep it in my rucksack at all times with a suitable padlock.

From Catherine

The Engagement Ring

That he will supply me a shiny new diamond engagement ring not less than six carats, upon my agreement to return Diana?s ring (I have seen a rather nice pink diamond courtesy of Laurence Graff)

Palaces

Up to Granny!

Palaces

That I have a one week timeshare apartment in each Royal Palace for one week a year to include Buckingham Palace, Windsor, Kensington Palace and Sandringham.

The Crown

That a replacement tiara will be purchased at a suitable accessory provider named Claire?s Accessories who will henceforth be granted the Royal Warrant.

The Crown

Whilst appreciating that the Crown must be returned, I do require a suitable copy to be provided for weekend use and parties.

Title

One would prefer that one?s ex will not retain the HRH but can instead retain a county of her choice.

Title

That I will keep the HRH and you can have the ring back, please refer to paragraph one above because in future I will be known as The Female previously known as Queen.

Waving

The Royal Wave shall be surrendered on divorce. A? suitable alternative hand gesture will be provided by Palace Officials

Waving

I will undertake to only have an intermittent wave as opposed to one that is constant

Other Issues

There shall be no appearance on any reality tv shows in particular It?s a Knockout, X-Factor or I?m a Royal Celebrity Get me out of here (despite what Edward suggests)

Other Issues

That I am entitled to any biscuit of my choosing not restricted to Royal Duchy Originals and a life time discount for all remaining Duchy of Cornwall Products.

Parents In law

At no time in the future upon divorce are her parents to wear jeans or chew gum for any public engagements in perpetuity .

Parents in law

I am very happy to have full contact for our children with Charles and Camilla provided that she never uses the word ?wicked? again publicly.

Clothes

That upon divorce that she will not participate in any fashion shows which will result in less than 80% body coverage and all materials shall be opaque.? Furthermore that all skirts must be lower than the royal knee and no patent shoes shall be worn to avoid risk of reflection.

Royal Designer Wardrobe

Whatever.

Royal Designer Wardrobe

That I will retain the full wardrobe of shoes, handbags, accessories and in addition be entitled to body search all and every butler before leaving any Palace.

Courtiers

That I will retain all Royal Courtiers provided that you return any or all Polo ponies purchased during the course of the marriage

Courtiers

That I will retain two ladies in waiting who need only curtsy on my waking and retiring.

Children

The Royal children be made available two days a week to the paternal great grandma and great grandpa to share walks with the corgis and to hunt, shoot and fish on demand.

Children

I am happy to agree with any of the issues concerning the children provided that I don?t have to accompany them.

Transport

I wish to keep all helicopters so that I can drop in at my mates parties? and will agree to buy her a suitable replacement car as soon as the ashtrays are full.

Transport

I am happy with the Range Rover to be exchanged as soon as the children dirty the backseat and to keep up to one million airmiles clocked up on credit cards despite any comments made by Mr Cameron.

Wedding Presents

Yah, I am happy for these to be split by agreement but I will keep the Xbox, the Wii, the computer games because I have a giggle with them with Harry and the boys.

Wedding Presents

I am happy to split everything by agreement but I don?t want to keep the commemorative plates or anything produced by the Royal Mint.

Fancy Dress Parties

There will be lots of such parties and she must attend at least six a year even after divorce. (The PM so loves them)

Fancy Dress Parties

I undertake not to wear any legwarmers or yellow hot pants and will continue to take advice from the Royal as to the suitable outfits (but not from Prince Harry at any time).

If you have any queries regarding prenuptial agreements please contact us on 02083 432 998 or complete the enquiry form online.

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