Should You Announce Your Impending Divorce On Social Media?

With over 200 million active Twitter users and a user base that includes almost every major celebrity in music, film, TV and literature, Twitter has skyrocketed in popularity since its inception in 2006. Facebook also has millions utilising its services, as do all forms of social media.

For many people social media is the go to platform for breaking news and information. Celebrities make announcements on twitter and other social media all of the time. It is the usual platform for announcing upcoming tours, a new show coming out, or discussing general mundane aspects of their lives all of which make it onto the platform.

We are often hearing that celebrities have announced their relationship split by utilising the social media. For example Katie Price took the decision to announce her divorce on Twitter from her husband Kieran Hayler. At the time there was many a raised eyebrow about the suitability of this kind of information being placed into the public forum.

Celebrities Announce Break-Ups on Twitter & Facebook

It would seem that celebrities no longer hold press conferences as they once did but take to the social media to spread the word across the internet.

Similarly Hrithik Roshan took to Facebook to announce the breakdown of his relationship from his wife Suzanne. He stated “Suzanne has decided to separate from me and end our seventeen year relationship. This is a very trying time for the entire family and I request the media and the people to grant us our privacy at this time”. This of course raised the issue that the media might not have known about it at all had he not chosen such a public method of announcing the split in the first place. Undoubtedly, he would have received advice from those around him ie publicists whether this was a good or bad idea for the sake of his career.

Katie Price announced on Twitter that her husband had “a full blown sexual affair with her best friend Jane Pountney”. However it is those like Katie and others who whilst utilising Twitter, Facebook etc to make such announcements, will when the publicity is unsuitable to their needs, claim that they want privacy.

Gwyneth Paltrow when splitting from Chris Martin announced that she was “consciously uncoupling” on social media. This created a whirlwind of media interest in what should have been a private issue, that continued for weeks.

Similarly Heidi Klum when ending the relationship with Seal took to Twitter to say “the end”. Again, kindling huge amounts of interest in the split and re-firing interest in their media careers.

Miley Cyrus took to Twitter to describe her split with Liam Hemsworth, to add salt to the wound they both decided to unfollow each other on social media making it quite clear how they were going to deal with their split.

Chanelle Hayes when splitting from Jack Tweed similarly brought to absolute public attention the reason why she had chosen to end the relationship, making it quite clear that her overwhelming distress over Jack’s comments to a magazine about his former love Jane Goody. Why was it necessary for her to state “It is overwhelmingly clear to me that we shouldn’t have ever entered into a relationship when he was still so badly grieving? Lately the toll of this has caused us to come to the decision that him staying with us when he is not ready to move on from the love of his life is simply unfair to all involved”. Surely comments such as this should be kept private as they are hurtful to everyone and deeply distressing for others to read.

Whilst it appears that the English in particular have an overwhelming fascination with the gory details of relationship breakdown, nevertheless this “in your face” information is not helpful and should not be in the public domain.

Chantelle Houghton revealed person details of Alex Reid on Twitter when it became clear that he was purportedly meeting a man dressed in women’s clothes. She stated on Twitter “Ok had enough … I found text messages on Alex’s phone … it was to a man and he was arranging to meet up with him as Roxanne for sex. It wasn’t the first time either … I’m in hell right now but who wouldn’t be” etc. Did this really advance sympathy for the situation or degrade her by announcing it?

So what realistically is the reason behind such public announcements and what often is the impact of this?

Why do Celebrities Share on Social Media?

There appears to be 10 basic reasons why celebrities in particular take to social media to make such announcements:-

1. Some celebrities make urgent announcements to pre-empt their partner doing the same. It is the “we are going to get in first” pattern of conduct.
2. Some make such announcements on advice from their publicists that it would suit an upcoming event immensely to create such media interest, such as a new film or TV series.
3. That it promotes their profile generally.
4. That the content of the announcement will cause such controversy that the basic principle of “all publicity is good publicity” will be appropriately adopted.
5. That they are angry and are making such announcements from anger alone without having considered the impact.
6. That they are egged on by others surrounding them to let the world know what kind of a person they were with.
7. Some believe that every aspect of their life on Facebook and social media is so overwhelmingly important to their fans that they should be the first to know. This is what we call “I am now not only believing my own publicity but living it”.
8. That they are so wounded by the events that they feel that they want public support in relation to their experience.
9. That they want the world to believe they are wronged to garner public sympathy even if the truth is very different.
10. That they are addicted to declaring their every thought publicly.

The impact of such public announcements are:-

1. That the celebrity may in fact lose all credibility by making such announcements.
2. However most gamble that if they hit the right note they will receive support from the public for a particular problem they are experiencing. In the case of announcing their partner’s infidelity, this usually brings temporary support.
3. That if children are involved they can be deeply wounded by the public pronouncements that may be made, with others hearing the news publicly before they have been told by their parents.
4. That they can, if they affect the career of the other, to their detriment by such pronouncements, impact on any financial settlement in divorce.
5. That there is an inability by some celebrities to understand that Judges can also look at social media including Twitter and Facebook to corroborate certain information if so invited in divorce proceedings. Accordingly taking to social media can provide evidence for the other side.
6. That these public announcements will come back to haunt them at a later date and they will very much come to regret them.
7. That it confuses the line between a right to privacy and a right by the media to publish such statements at a later date. One of the big issues in the Leveson enquiry was the dichotomy between celebrities courting in the media and rejecting the same if they did not have control over the particular issue if it showed them in an unfortunate light.
8. That they will engender interest rather than kill a story by such announcements until dealt with by a joint statement.
9. That outbursts about their partner can sometimes smack of desperation particularly when announced by a TV or film personality whose career is on the decline.
10. That it can reveal the lack of substance of the person making the announcement or offend a great many people if fired off without thinking.

The moral of this issue is whether you are a celebrity or not exposing the outside world to the minutiae of your personal life is really not a clever idea unless very carefully considered. Most lawyers would certainly advise, as would I “sometimes silence can be golden!”